How Bourekas Are Shaping Up

This post first appeared as “A Boureka Nightmare” on The Jew and the Carrot blog at the Forward.

Lovers of bourekas, one of Israel’s national foods, had better brush up on their geometry. The Chief Rabbinate has issued new guidelines on the shapes of the pastry pockets — and no, we’re not kidding.

Until now, consumers have relied on signage by storeowners or package labels to discern among meat, dairy and pareve bourekas, which closely resemble turnovers, only with greasier dough. Now, the kashrut authority is apparently trying to standardize things across the country to keep consumers from accidentally breaking kosher laws.

A letter sent by the Chief Rabbinate to factories and bakeries states that beginning August 7, all kosher-certified dairy bourekas made from puff pastry must be triangular, while non-dairy or pareve ones must be square or rectangular in shape. Oh, and, there are different rules for bourekas encased in phyllo dough. These ones must be triangular or spiral shaped if they are non-dairy, and round or cigar shaped if they contain dairy. It’s all enough to give grown adults scary middle school math exam flashbacks.

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© 2013 Renee Ghert-Zand. All rights reserved.

Howard Jacobson Wins a Pig

This post first appeared on The Arty Semite blog at the Forward.

Howard Jacobson and Zoo Time

Author Howard Jacobson tried to be discreet about what he had eaten for breakfast while being interviewed about winning the Bollinger Everyman Wodehouse prize for comic fiction. He’d had bacon and eggs, and the prize was a 10-year-old kunekune sow named Zoo Time, after Jacobson’s winning novel about a writer distracted from writing.

This was not the first time that the Man Booker-winning British writer has been awarded a Bollinger Everyman Wodehouse pig. He received his first one in 2000, and it was named Mighty Walzer, after his winning book that year. Jacobson admitted to having never gone back to visit Mighty Walzer, but promised to develop a closer relationship with Zoo Time.

The Wodehouse prize, which “captures the comic spirit of the Jeeves creator,” was presented to Jacobson at the Telegraph Hay Festival, a six-day arts and literature festival, considered to be Britain’s foremost event of its kind.

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© 2013 Renee Ghert-Zand. All rights reserved.

There Will Be No Second ‘Lebowski’

This post first appeared on The Arty Semite blog at the Forward.

Jeff Bridges, with his new “The Dude and the Zen Master” book, may be having a hard time saying goodbye to his “Big Lebowski” alter-ego.

But that is not at all the case with the Coen brothers, who recently said quite definitively that there would be no sequel to the 1998 cult classic, whose popularity continues to grow.

“No, I don’t see it in our future,” said Ethan Coen at a press conference at the Cannes Film Festival last Monday. “I don’t think it’s going to happen … I just don’t like sequels,” added his brother Joel.

While Bridges and co-star John Turturro are game for a reprise of their roles in the film, the Coens are more focused on current and future projects — none of which are likely to involve hippie bowlers.

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© 2013 Renee Ghert-Zand. All rights reserved.